Long ago I had someone tell me that I needed to speak positively to myself to reap positive results. I gave it a try, but somehow it felt terribly unnatural being my own biggest cheerleader. However, as the good results began to outweigh the bad, I was positive. I smiled more. I gave more compliments. I found myself chiding others for not being the same way. (The latter may have lead to some of the criticism my family put on me about 'having changed'.)
As my willfulness began to unravel after my first knee injury, I began to forget this important lesson. I read through the months after the beginning of the year and realize I was slowly losing myself in hate talk.
Now I must go back to the original lesson, find its essence and embrace it, because willingness without belief is defeat waiting to happen.
No one can undo my hard work. Except me. And a bad attitude. :)
Yours in change, Kate
I struggle with positive talk/hate talk as well. I think I've spent so many years doing the self-deprecating jokes to avoid hearing someone else make fun of me (perceived or real), that eventually I internalized it.
ReplyDeleteHere's to trying to be as nice to myself as I am my friends!
Yea, it's like we wanted to acknowledge our shortcomings before anyone else. I suppose it comes from years of having others make fun of me. I just want to beat them to the punch. Funny, I probably shouldn't be around people like that anyway.
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