Busy + Stressed = Junk Food, But Don't Give Up

Today has been one of those days where I had to do my job and the work of others.  Now, I am sitting at work at eight o'clock at night again, trying to finish my own.  Strike that, trying to just put band-aids on things until tomorrow, when I can finish.

All of this has led me to stress eat.  I ordered Chinese delivered this afternoon as I saw everything unraveling.  I knew I would be here late again and I justified it that way.  Team that with the fact that being so busy left me no time for my workout with Gwyn at the YMCA Healthy Living Center and I am unhappy.

And just now?  I took a deep breath, sighed and let it go.  That's what you have to do on the days when 'it' doesn't go the way it should.  'It' being the healthy plan you have carved out for yourself.

We have to let it go, because to be honest, we are too busy not to.  If we don't just mark today off and reaffirm our commitment for tomorrow, we will be lost in a downward spiral.  One meal of junk food can easily lead to the mindset that, "Well, I ate that, I might as well eat this...".  That's how we have gained and lost and gained and lost a thousand times.  We weigh ourselves down with regrets.

So, the next time you have a day like mine, let it wash away.  It's just one day, one meal, one workout; it is not how you are going to live.  No, YOU are going to live healthy, don't give up!

Yours in Health,
Kate

I Think It's Bubble Bath Time

It's only Thursday and yet, it feels like it should be next Wednesday.  It has been a hard, stressful week of everyone else's problems being mine.  I was even mean to one of my favorite people here at work today.  She bore the brunt of my frustration and it wasn't fair.  I will try to make it up to her, but it made me look hard at my stress level.

They still have no answers as to why I landed in the hospital, they say they may never know.  With the way the week has slowly worn me down, I'm leaning toward the guess the emergency room doctors proffered - yep, stress.  Feeling overwhelmed, overworked, lacking sleep and faltering.  I have been working hard on the sleep, but the work has risen again.  So, I will attempt to correct.

My parents are going on vacation next week and this may be a good chance.  You see, I am dog-sitting three furry children who need a little more attention than my lifestyle usually allows.  But I am thinking that I will try to telecommute from my mom's house as much as possible.  That will cause those most in need of my help to e-mail me or call my cell for assistance, thereby limiting interruptions.  Hey, I might actually accomplish something.

For now, I am serious about that bubble bath.  I am grabbing dinner, going home and sinking in a tub-o-bubbles. :)

Yours in Health,
Kate

Thanksgiving Week

A week and a half ago I was laying in a hospital bed.  As I lay there I began to feel very alone and sorry for myself.  I had ended up in the emergency room after almost passing out at work.  They couldn't figure out what was wrong with me (and still haven't) and I was at a loss.

I began to cry.  But then my cell phone began to beep - text after text starting coming in from friends and co-workers checking on my status.  I stopped, took a deep breath, and began counting my blessings.

My friend Mary had driven me to the hospital and stayed until my mom dropped everything at work and came to be with me.  I had medical coverage that would help take the sting out of my hospital bills.  And while there was no one physically in the room with me at that moment - the phone calls and texts assured me I was loved.  I was suddenly full of gratitude, I was truly thankful.

So, as this week begins and I face going to yet another doctor in search of answers, I will not hold a pity party.  Instead I will embrace the abundance of my life and move forward with appreciation.

One of the things I appreciate is YOU - those who have stuck with reading my blog and giving me feedback.  Through illness and falter, happiness and loss - you have been here. The way I will say thank you is giving you daily recipes this week.  The Holiday Season is officially beginning and for anyone trying to be healthier there are more pitfalls than can be counted.  Hopefully these recipes will ease some of the stress of making good choices.

Thick and Creamy Spinach-Artichoke Dip

If you have an aversion to mayonnaise, like I do, this is a great take on a classic.  Add a giant platter of veggies to this and you have a healthier snack while dinner readies.

Ingredients:
1 (14-1/2 oz.) can quartered or whole artichoke hearts in water, drained
1 (10 oz.) pkg. frozen chopped spinach, thawed, squeezed dry
1 (7 oz.) tub 2% fat Greek style yogurt, such as Fage

¾ cup shredded Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese, divided
2 tablespoons light sour cream
1/8 teaspoon each: salt, freshly ground black pepper and freshly ground nutmeg

Preparation:

Heat oven to 400°F.

Finely chop the artichoke hearts and place them in a medium bowl. Add spinach, yogurt, ½ cup of the cheese, sour cream, pepper and nutmeg.

Mix well and spread into a 9-inch pie plate or quiche dish. Sprinkle remaining ¼ cup cheese over dip and bake 20 minutes or until heated through.

Serve warm or at room temperature.

Makes about 3 cups dip.

Yours in Health,

Kate

This and That and the Other Thing

The last 48 hours have been a blur.

Work has been crazy, but we put the next edition of Intuition Magazine to bed this afternoon, so that was huge.  Really like this issue, it's fun, very holiday.  The cover is beautiful, which has everything to do with our model Lindsey, great photography by Paige and design by Jolene.

One of my bosses and dear friends is leaving, we had her going away breakfast this morning.  I ate too many eggs AND had hash-browns - I know, I let my emotions eat for me.

Yesterday, I had a strenuous workout with Gwyn at the YMCA Healthy Living Center.  Tomorrow I am going to find a video of the torture exercise she likes to have me do, um, it's hard.  Whine. But I also know my abs greatly benefit, so I am torn. ;)  The day before that it was a water workout.  Those are really hard, but I love them.  I have even taken to doing an almost identical one at least once over every weekend.  I am seeing nice results.

Today, no workout, but then Thursday has become my day off.  Tomorrow it's back in the pool or maybe upstairs with weights because I missed Monday.  (No voice.)

I just finished writing a press release for a special concert that will be announced tomorrow morning.  That's all I can tease, but I promise details over the weekend.

Okay, that was enough rambling for three people, so I am going to wrap up and finally go home.  Good night.

Yours in Health,
Kate

Stupid, Ugly, Angry Day

I am 30 minutes from leaving work and I have to be back at 8 a.m.  I won't go into details, but suffice it to say today went totally off the rails at the hands of others.  I didn't get in my workout because there was a sudden work emergency.  My new kitten is sick.  And on and on.  I have eaten like crap and I am brutally cranky because my life feels out of control.

Whine.

Someone cue Scarlet O'Hara: "Tomorrow is another day."  And that's my story and I am sticking to it.  See you then.

Yours in Health,
Kate

Looong Week and Lots of Rain

Yes, it has been one of those weeks.  Lots of stress at work, lots of silly people in the world outside of work (and that's being kind) and the rain simply won't abate.  I am sitting here, listening to the water pour onto the roof at work as I finish my duties before heading for a workout.  That's the one area in my life that has been o.k. this week.

I had three great workouts with trainer Gwyn at the YMCA Healthy Living Center.  She even put me on a cardio machine I wouldn't have tried on my own - and it worked.  I wouldn't have tried it because I was afraid the pushing down and swiveling around would leave my knees aching horribly.  As luck would have it, it left me sore, but otherwise alright.  In fact, I am still feeling my glutes throb, which is good, because my glutes need plenty of work.

Now I am going to go work things out in the water of the exercise pool - I know, I could just stand outside and get soaked to.  Here's hoping tomorrow's sunny forecast holds or we will have fall floods to match the spring and summer ones. ;)

Tomorrow:  Introducing Dr. Sheldon Cooper

Yours in Health,
Kate

Flooding

This week has been nearly lost to drug reaction hell and flooding.

I am finally starting to feel better after my bad run with prednisone.  I was able to get 5 straight hours of sleep last night.  Of course I had worked 14.5 hours getting my regular things and flood coverage done, so I was exhausted.  I am also suffering from vertigo again.  My head spun so hard last night when I got into bed I actually fell over - luckily the bed is somewhat cushy!  LOL.

Oh well, with the Iowa State Fair getting underway I am even busier.  I took a walk earlier, but it's so meltingly hot I didn't get very far.  I will spend the rest of the day catching up from yesterday and doing flood stuff.

Speaking of the fair, I will be posting that article about fair food I promised from the latest edition of !ntuition Magazine tomorrow morning.

Yours in Health,
Kate

Friday Funday

Well, actually, I am at work.  But I am doing my best to have fun.  I have 80's rock banging away in my headphones as I try to push up productivity.  We are having a potluck in a little while - I ordered in crab Rangoon and egg rolls as my contribution - yea, working hard. :)

As for the healthy thing, yesterday I was too busy to workout.  Those are words I hate, but I am going to make up for it tonight and tomorrow.  Tonight it's time to mow, originally planned for tomorrow, but with the heat index going over 100 again, uh no.  Instead I will do the yard tonight and believe me, it's a workout!

Tomorrow it's a workout with my mom.  She wanted to try kick-boxing with me leading the way tonight, but instead it's going to be golf for her.  I am very proud of her by the way.  She has joined the YMCA Healthy Living Center as part of the Livestrong program.  It helps cancer survivors and patients become healthier to help ward off the chance of recurrence.  Mom is several years past Ovarian cancer now, but anyone who has had that has a better chance of breast cancer and vice versa.  So, I am happy she is grabbing this opportunity - I have no intention of losing her anytime soon.

Mom and I will beat the heavy bag tomorrow afternoon.  I plan to put in a swim before we meet up.  Then I will be 'caught up' on my workouts for the week.  That's the key you know.  If life gets in the way, be flexible, make a plan and follow through.  I'm proud that I am able to do that.

Well, I better go, fried food will be here soon to share with my co-workers.  I know, "Bad Kate!"  But really, anything in moderation.

Yours in Health,
Kate

You May Think This is Weird...

But I kinda want them to find something when they do my exploratory surgery tomorrow.  I don't want cancer, just answers.  Maybe endometriosis or cysts, something simple, LOL.  It's just that I have been in pain for so long and it just keeps increasing, I want them to go in, look around and be all - "Hey, we have a solution".  I realized this morning the pain was affecting my sleep, which may explain why I have been so tired the last few weeks.  Whatever happens, I will let you know.

As for workout today with Gwyn at the YMCA Healthy Living Center?  Yea, she wasn't kidding about kicking my butt. :)  I did some things today I haven't done since I was a healthy girl before.  The nice thing is that I didn't pass out.  I had to stop a few times, but I pushed through and finished.  If I hadn't been able to shake the pain, Gwyn would have changed things up.  But I refused.  Besides, with surgery tomorrow, I have a few days to recover.

Well, I have to go do a ton of work before I am gone, so have a great weekend and I will blog again as soon as I can.

Yours in Health,
Kate

Life is Beginning to Swirl Again

Getting that 'so busy I am feeling crazy' vibe again.  I worked, I ate lunch while filling in for someone else - TIP: Smokey D's will skip the bun on a sandwich for you AND charge you 75 cents less!  What a great way to save on calories, it's the amazing smoked turkey I want anyway!

I had a great workout with Gwyn at the YMCA Healthy Living Center.  We did upper body and core.  I tried to knock her out with one of the weight machines, but she is cagey and was able to move in time.  ;o)

Then I came back here to work and now I am taking work home to do.  Tomorrow even busier including a party for LITE listeners tomorrow night at Mercy West Lakes - my new favorite hospital.

But this is also the week we are trying to put !ntuition Magazine to bed and I have MUCH writing to do before we can do that.  So, that's what I am taking home.  BTW - This is a special issue of the magazine because it will feature LITE 104.1's Outstanding Women You Should Know.  You can catch a preview and see pictures of these wonderful women - here.

Yours in Health,
Kate

Finally Friday

I don't know about you, but even though this was a 'short week' due to the holiday, it has felt awfully long.  I have to work both Saturday and Sunday but I am going to try to keep it under four hours each day and hopefully that will boost my attitude.

I am finishing the web articles today for Outstanding Women.  I have decided to do shorter ones for the web and more details for !ntuition Magazine.  That means I can more details about the women and that's a very good thing because it's hard to summarize amazing women in just 300 words.  :) 

My need to write 90%of my day means I will not be working out today.  But I will be making up for it tomorrow.  As soon as I am done with work I am going to hit the YMCA Healthy Living Center and spend quality time beating the bag and doing cardio.  Trainer Gwyn and I agreed it is time to step up cardio.  It's one of the reasons the scale isn't moving much.  I am putting on muscle and losing inches, but the fat isn't shedding at the rate we might hope, so it's time to work harder.

That is actually right on track with my knee.  Therapist Kristi and I agreed to take my PT down to every other week unless something happens and I end up in pain.  It means more exercises at home and increasing what I do with Gwyn, but I am excited, because it also means that running will be a real possibility once I get enough weight off.  (I can't go pounding on my knee at this weight.)

Tonight I am doing a remote broadcast at the Blank Park Zoo, it is their first Family Fun Night of the year.  Hopefully the weather will cooperate.  Right now though I better hit the shower - I stayed home this morning to write.  Yea for writing in my nightgown!

Have a good day!

Yours in Health,
Kate

The Week Begins

Yesterday I worked in the morning and then went home to find Lori was nearly as tuckered out as I and so we hung out for a while and then I took a nap.  It was the kind of nap you can't wake up from, so that wasn't very helpful.  That lead to a fitful night's sleep last night.  My brain is on overdrive.  It is starting to feel a bit insane.  The dreams are vivid but for the most part make no sense.  Which makes me believe I should workout harder. :)

The nights after I workout with Gwyn at the YMCA Healthy Living Center I sleep much better.  Luckily I meet with her today.  There was no Intuitive Eating Class at the Mercy Weight Loss and Nutrition Center yesterday because of the holiday.  But I have been doing my best to practice what it has taught me so far.

Last night I had one of my favorite desserts - angel food cake with strawberries and whip cream.  The strawberries were fresh from the Berry Patch north of Des Moines.  The angel food cake was personal size and the whip cream was light with no partially hydrogenated crap.  So, for about 200 calories I was totally satisfied, I love spring!

Well, I better go work.  Have a great day!

Yours in Health,
Kate

Spinning Just Within My Control

I am having the kind of week where, if I don't have a note telling me where to be next, I will forget everything.  So, sorry I forgot to blog yesterday, it's getting crazy.

Quick workout updates with Gwyn at YMCA Healthy Living Center:  Monday was lots of upper body, tough but good.  Tuesday was a morning water workout when I confused my times for physical therapy and refused to waste a trip to Clive.  Then with Gwyn in the afternoon it was kickboxing and core, still loving boxing - even used my new gloves.  Today it was lower body and some core and to be honest, compared to the other two days this week, it was easy.  However, the first two were really hard, so it's all relative. 

My dad is doing well post operation for his hip.  Thank you for the kind words via e-mail and post.  He is doing two PT sessions today, so he will be exhausted tonight.  I am so busy I am probably not going to get to Mercy West Lakes to see him.  The good news is he is on track to check out tomorrow.  BTW - I wanted to share my opinion of Mercy WL really quickly.  Now, no one has asked me too, but I have to gush. 

What a beautiful facility!  It's actually visitor friendly, you can find that cafe and the patient rooms are the nicest I have seen.  I am really impressed.  Plus, the staff are a great bunch of pros and really on top of things.  I have felt completely comfortable with my dad being there.  I even rested my eyes for a few minutes in the lobby on his floor when he needed some privacy and it was so serene I nearly fell asleep - not what I think of when it comes to a hospital.

As for me, my PT went well this morning.  I was noting to Kara that after a weekend that went like mine, my knee would normally be screaming, if I could walk at all.  Now, after just a few weeks of therapy, it is a bit sore, but that's it.  I'm not finished yet, but I feel like I can see the sign to find the end of the tunnel.

Well, I have to go, I have two interviews I need to do this afternoon for LITE 104.1's Outstanding Women You Should Know.  I will tell you more about that as soon as I get chance.

Yours in Health,
Kate

Crazy Saturday

First, I want to say I had a blast bowling last night for NASCAR community day!  (And it's more exercise than you think!)  I was paired up with NASCAR drivers Matt Kobyluck and Joey Gase.  Matt is from Connecticut and had his son along because it's his birthday weekend.  Joey is just 17 and from Cedar Rapids!  We also had a fan, Ryan, bowling with us.  Everyone was great, you can tell NASCAR is a real family and I would do it again in a heartbeat.  Thanks to Craig Armstrong and the gang at the Iowa Speedway for inviting me.  If you are looking for great racing, Newton is the place this weekend and three other weekends this summer.

Now, my crazy Saturday:  I will finish writing this, do a shift on LITE, fix an Information Iowa problem, help a friend with a project (where we walk around in circles for hours filling bags) and then it's off to do another charity event.  This time it's the volunteer effort Give Back Des Moines.

I will be broadcasting from 4-6 this afternoon at Principal Park, they are having family activities as they encourage people to pick a non-profit to volunteer for.  Then after that I plan to stick around for a while at the Iowa Cubs game, they play at 6:35.

Weee!  With a day like this, I better get going.  Hope you have a great one!

Yours in Health,
Kate

Hope on the Horizon

I have a secret, that I just can't tell, but it's BIG.  In fact, if it comes to pass, it's life altering. 

I had a great meeting today with two of my bosses and two ladies that have an energy and passion that is infectious.  The project we met about is incredibly close to me and I am beyond excited at all the possibilities.

But since I can't talk about what I am not talking about specifically....     :)

I will talk about the other important point here - my bosses.  I have four, they are as different and the same as any four people could be, but they are awesome in their own ways.  The two I want to specifically mention are Scott and Marianne. 

Scott is our Operations Manager for DMRG and our Program Director for both STAR 102.5 and LITE 104.1.  He is the do-it-all dad of two daughters that would make a killer political handler.  Scott can manage a million personalities and get the job done, most days with a smile on his face.  He believes in me, my work and my future.  He is kind and thoughtful and works as hard as anyone here, he has my great respect.

Marianne?  What can I say?  She and I were friends long before she was my boss and sometimes we both get so busy, we forget that part.  (We're way overdue for coffee.)  As a boss, she is fair, firm and inspiring.  She wants you to succeed and is always concerned for your well-being beyond work.  Marianne is a great check for me both when I am too passionate about something and when I am wearing down.  Even with the addition of her baby son, she finds a way to manage a department with more moving parts than the Space Shuttle.  She also has my affection and respect. 

They were both with me at this meeting that is giving me hope.  Whether this project pulls through or not, their support, belief and appreciation of me will not be soon forgotten.  It's moments like this I feel lighter, even when I haven't lost a pound. 

Yours in health,
Kate

Where does the week go?

I am so busy I constantly have to ask myself, "What day is this?"  And yes, I usually do it aloud.  I get lost in time and sometimes wonder if I am actually asleep or just in a haze.  But, that's because I have a great job that is so diverse I always have a new project popping up.  Then again, busy is good as I have mentioned before because it keeps me out of the vending machine. 

So, it has meant a week of being very good with my food.  Lots of fruits and veggies and no take-out!  I have had two naughty moments - a cookie that Luke's wife Susan (a culinary goddess) made and a second bagel for breakfast after a meeting this morning (too much cream cheese of course).

I could beat myself up, but this is so far from where I had been with my stress eating, I am going to take the medium size victories and remember tomorrow is another day. :)

Yours in health,
Kate

Long Day

No workout today. Started work at 5 a.m. Took a two hour break to go to doctor and eat lunch from noon-2 p.m. Just leaving work now.

I am tired and trying to find my footing in getting my life back. I have let it swan out before me in 10-12 hour days for months, there's only so long that can stand.

For now, I will settle for finding dinner, my cats and my couch.

Yours in health, Kate

Tripping toward my wits end

I am exhausted. I never had a chance to recover from the weekend and now I have just put in another 10 hour day. I would sleep in tomorrow but I have to deal with a situation first thing.

I am so frustrated and tired I just want to cry.

I want to eat and sleep and do absolutely nothing.

I am on the edge of, ah crap, I have no idea what.

I am hoping to go to bed early and wake up with a fresh perspective.

I just keep repeating, "I am grateful for what I have and will not dwell on what I don't". Hopefully soon I will believe it.

Yours, Kate

A week of losing track

I have been able to slide toward getting back on track with food. I have spent the week making better choices. I realized I kept trying to go directly back to the way the uber-healthy me was eating and that won't work. I have gone too deep into my old habits. So rather than beating my head against that brick wall that is myself, I will give myself a break - as so many wise people have already told me to do.

They announced my work transition today, I still have no idea how I feel. No one is quite sure how to treat me. Mainly I am so busy, I haven't had time to 'think' it to death, which is good.

My lungs checked out o.k. earlier this week with a new chest x-ray. They now believe I may have 'injured' my lungs or had a small untreated infection earlier this year that caused my sudden onset of asthmatic symptoms. I am on a steroid inhaler for a month or so to see if that helps.

There will be more later, but I am finally leaving work and just wanted to check in.

Yours in transition, Kate

Where the Hell Have I Been?

24 days. That's how long it has been since my last post.

In that time we have elected a new president, my job has changed again, I have gained more weight, my knee injury is only slightly better, I have moved into my new house and I have come to the conclusion it's time to seek help.

Well, geez. I wasn't really going to talk about that last one. But I will in a minute because apparently I need to. First - the other things.

A new president - The election sucked away my time, as expected. I ate poorly and exercised, not at all.

My job - It's complicated, as usual. I will again be making a transition because it's best for the team. I have no idea whether it's best for me or not, I've had no time or inclination to think about it.

The weight - I am attempting to eat my emotions away. One cookie, cake and sub sandwich at a time, hoping to assuage my pain, so far, it's not working for crap.

My knee - I had an MRI. There is a tear in my cartilage, but it's not where it should be causing pain. They would like to do exploratory surgery. I am giving it another couple months of therapy and then reassessing. I have this thing about knives.

My new house - That's what sapped my time after the election. I had to pack and plan and execute a move. Everything went almost exactly as planned - right up until we landed with the first truckload last Saturday and one half of the former owners was still moving out. I kind of saw it coming though and rolled with it. The way I have been feeling lately, that was kind of a little miracle. Anyway, just in the unpacking phase now. Next week is about creating a list of projects and putting together a five year plan for remodels and renovations.

My mental health - I have eluded to it here on the blog for months. Things have been falling to pieces inside my head. I am at the point where I feel like I can't deal with them alone. I will be seeking counseling next week.

I think a lot of things have lead to this point, again. And all of the reasons above, as well as my continued crap luck with men have been a catalyst. That last part pisses me off the most. That I would let anything any man might do affect my mental health or eating habits makes me angry, mostly at myself. Once more I have fallen into a spiraling pattern of pain and self-loathing.

I will NOT let this happen. It is not o.k. to be in pain. It is not o.k. to eat myself back to morbidly obese. This will get better.

The difference now is that I recognize these patterns. That means, when I do walk into a counseling session, I will be ready to be helped and that is half the battle.

Yours, getting back into the saddle, Kate