I did something I have been avoiding for a while yesterday - I stepped on the scale. It was almost exactly where I thought it would be 179. That's 30 pounds over my lowest weight earlier this year. That's also 44 pounds away from my original goal.
The numbers are bad, but the feeling is worse. Mentally it's made me a mess and physically, I'm blech. Plus, my clothes no longer fit.
So, I think it is time to bribe myself. I haven't done this in a long time, but ridiculous times call for old school measures.
Here it is:
5 pounds - new album download for mp3 player to workout to (probably Nickelback's new one)
10 pounds - "His Girl Friday" on DVD - I aspire to be Hildy.
15 pounds - Another album download (probably the new 3 Doors Down)
20 pounds - Pedicure
25 pounds - Album download
30 pounds - Pedicure and Massage
35 pounds - New running shoes (I just bought some, so by then they should need replaced)
40 pounds - New clothes (workout, work, play and maybe a swimsuit)
45 pounds - if this level makes sense, I will negotiate with myself then.
3 months maintenance - Pedicure, facial, massage
6 months maintenance - Weekend away
9 months maintenance - new winter coat and boots
1 year maintenance - The works - clothes, hair, spa, etc.
Maintaining at 40th birthday (not quite three years from now) - trip abroad, probably England and Ireland.
There it is, in writing, my blatant attempt to get myself back on track through gifts. I deserve to be completely healthy again, so I will entice myself however necessary. Kind of feeling pathetic that I have to do this. But also feeling like something has to give and it might as well be me.
Yours in health, Kate tips,
P.S. - I am copying this over with pictures to post at work and home to keep my eye on the prize.